


Soak Through

by WhoopsOK



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Consent Issues, Frottage, Guilty Sam Winchester, Half-Sibling Incest, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Nipple Play, Quiet Sex, Secret Relationship, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-11
Updated: 2019-01-11
Packaged: 2019-10-08 01:49:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17377262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhoopsOK/pseuds/WhoopsOK
Summary: By now, they’ve gotten to the point where Sam has tricked himself into thinking this is ok as long as they keep their clothes on.(Adam wants Sam and doesn’t feel nearly as bad about it as Sam does.)





	Soak Through

**Author's Note:**

> Belated Kinktober Day 16: Nipple Play, Frottage

Sam breaks down in stages that are almost painful to watch, but Adam can’t help feeling a guilty twist of relief as each one passes.

At first, Adam knew he was the plague Sam was avoiding. He could see that the shock of his presence cut through the grief that had clung to him since Dean dragged him out of Palo Alto. The replacement child, the _bastard_ child he never knew about, standing in his old shoes. They didn’t speak much at first and, frankly, Adam didn’t blame him. But Sam isn’t the type to hold a grudge against someone who didn’t even do anything. The grief and pain never leave, but they do dull and Sam defrosts. First for Dean, then for Adam.

Adam likes him melty.

Getting Sam to kiss him had been the start of a slope they weren’t getting off of without a horrific crash landing, they both knew it. Sam had tried so hard to keep his feet under him, but he was sliding fast towards a pit he couldn’t see the bottom of. Adam knows what he _wants_ to be down there, has pulled himself off in the shower thinking about it, but he doesn’t push, tries to tread delicately.

Sam cries the first time and Adam can’t feel bad the same way Sam does, but he still sympathizes. He holds him, holds his face close and whispers against his lips, _it’s ok, it’s ok, you’re ok, Sammy, don’t cry, you’re not dirty_ —

The last part is too much to take because Sam pulls away from him, can’t look at him for a week. Something Dean definitely notices, but doesn’t mention; something Adam doubts John notices at all.

Still, it is only a week, because they don’t live the sort of lives where they can avoid each other for long. Adam picks his way back across the chasm, smiles bright and steals kisses when nobody’s looking. It takes months for Sam to stop flinching.

By now, they’ve gotten to the point where Sam has tricked himself into thinking this is ok as long as they keep their clothes on. Like they’re being innocuous enough that they can coast here forever. Adam _would_ coast here forever, knows good and well he’s walking a thin line between this and nothing ever again. But Adam learned what desire looks like on his brother’s face and, _fuck_ , all he wants is to give.

They’re down two credit cards, so it’s all four of them to a motel room instead of splitting off in twos. It’s temptation in its worse form, because Sam is _right there_ and Adam can’t do anything about it.

Or he probably _shouldn’t_ but, well.

There isn’t any reason for Adam to think about his life in terms of “should and shouldn’t” anymore, is there? Dean is out late chasing a skirt and John is out cold on the couch in front of the TV. Adam isn’t wasting the opportunity when it’s already rare enough that they share a bed.

Rolling onto his side, Adam watches Sam feign sleep. Dean always teases him about being new-agey and Adam half-wonders if he’s trying to meditate his lust away. He doesn’t think it’s too egotistical to believe Sam is as affected by this as he is.  When he reaches out to put his hand on Sam’s chest, he feels him hold his breath. It starts back, unsteadily, when Adam starts to rub his hand back and forth. Part of him wants it to be soothing; part of him knows it can’t be and revels in that. He stays over Sam’s shirt even though the temptation to run his fingers along Sam’s collar bones is so strong it tingles in his fingers. He also stays mostly above Sam’s sternum, because if he slides down over his abs he’d be too prone to try for lower. He’s already skating thin ice. He has to be light about how he dances on it.

Sliding forward so his chest is pressed against Sam’s shoulder makes his brother go tense, but he doesn’t react beyond that. Flicking Sam’s nipple makes him suck in a sharp, near silent breath. It’s too dark to see exactly what Sam’s face does, but he does turn to Adam sharply, wide awake.

“ _Shh_ ,” Adam shushes, lips nearly right against Sam’s cheek. “Shh,” he says and does it again, more deliberately making Sam jerk. He starts shifting beneath the sheets when Adam pinches him through the fabric, rolling his nipple between his finger and thumb, pulling back just to rub it with the tip of his finger. Sam opens his mouth to say something—it sounds like the start of Adam’s name—but he chokes it back. Adam feels the urge to make him groan, to make him shout and growl so acutely it feels like it’s burning alive under his skin; how long will he have to wait for that day?

No point in wondering for now, he moves to the other nipple, uses his nail to tease a little before the shuddering of Sam’s breath gets too hard to ignore. He gives him what he’s silently begging for, even as something in the back of Adam’s mind tells him Sam wants more than what he’s willing to let his body beg for. He kisses Sam’s cheek, feels how hot he is under his lips and tugs at his shirt. Not to pull it off, but to urge Sam sideways, facing him.

Sam puts up the token hesitation but, as always, sways under Adam’s hands.

They’re chest to chest for a moment, for long enough for Adam to steal a kiss before sliding down the bed. Sam’s hand flies up to the back of his head when Adam kisses the center of his chest, quickly working his way over to a nipple. The fabric tastes plain, only faintly of sweat as he laves his tongue over Sam’s nipple so his spit soaks through before he bites at him softly. Sam shudders all over when Adam pulls back to blow on it, the fabric chilling against his bare skin. Adam hates himself a little for being jealous of a fucking shirt.

The teasing back and forth of Adam’s mouth and fingers goes on for ages until Adam feels Sam start to calm down some. Turned on, hopelessly so, but stone still save for his heaving breath. Adam has never wanted Sam frozen, but will move for him until he’s willing to move for himself.

Kissing Adam is familiar enough by this point that it doesn’t trip up the rhythm of Sam’s heart too much. He does jolt rather violently, though, when Adam slots their crotches together.

“Please,” Adam murmurs against his lips, actually out loud, making Sam’s gaze jerk towards John. Adam gets a hand on his face and drags his attention back, can’t stand for it to be divided, not right now. He can see the step Sam’s about to trip down, can feel how close it is, how close _Sam_ is to him. “Just like this,” he whispers, gently rocking his hips and staring right in to his brother’s wide eyes.

“ _Shit,_ ” Sam coughs out softly, full of pain and longing and he should _never_ have to hurt for Adam, he’s right here.

“Shh,” Adam says again, wrapping his arm around Sam’s back, pulling him close. “S’ok, come on, come— _oh._ ”

Sam doesn’t roll over him completely, nothing so bold, but he does press Adam down slightly, half his weight holding him in place as he grinds down against Adam’s arousal. Adam’s mouth flies open, something unwisely loud on the brink of escaping. Sam’s tongue slipping between his lips smothers it. It’s slow going, trying to take it easy, trying not to rock the bed and wake their _father, fuck_ , but Sam moves like he’s used to taking his pleasure silently. Adam will learn, if he can have this—Sam’s breath shivering over his lips, his fingers bruising Adam’s back, their hard cocks rocking together—he’ll learn anything.

The end is rushing up to meet him faster than he could stop even if he wanted to. Adam holds back so much around Sam he can’t help but lose himself in controlled doses. They don’t have the time for slow, not yet, so Adam wants to come against Sam so badly he’s breathless with it. He spreads his leg a little further, fists a hand in Sam’s hair, whimpering softly, “ _Fuck, Sammy, please._ ”

Sam hisses through his teeth and Adam _feels_ Sam’s cock pulsing in his pants as he comes. It’s more than enough to set Adam off, leaving him jerking fretfully in Sam’s arms, crushed against his chest. It’s probably to keep him still and quiet, but Adam pretends it’s because he just can’t help himself.

Breathing quietly is a chore, but Adam tries to hold it together. They took a big risk, even with the late night show streaming quietly into the room. He can feel anxiety sneaking back into Sam with every breath he takes. Adam doesn’t want to let him go yet, doesn’t want Sam to let him go yet.

They’re wet where their crotches are pressed together, closer than they’ve ever been.

Adam isn’t ready to lose this just yet. He doesn’t even remember consciously deciding to do so when he reaches between them, brushing his fingers along Sam’s still half-hard dick. Sam catches his wrist tight enough to ache. Not before Adam’s fingers come away tingling with the memory of the shape of his brother’s dick. Sam is breathing hard again, loud enough that Adam almost says something about it. Instead, he just sighs, lets his free hand rest on Sam’s chest and gently pushes out of his grip. Better to rip the bandage off himself than let Sam awkwardly try to ease it off.

It doesn’t surprise Adam that Sam launches up off the bed when he puts his fingers in his mouth, slick with the combination of their come, so he doesn’t feel the need to react. Sam can have the bathroom alone to collect himself under the guise of changing.

Adam sucks his fingers for a few indulgent moments before he changes under the covers, imagining a day when he doesn’t have to taste his brother through fabric.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading…you are far too precious to be kept secret!


End file.
